30
A GIRL OF THE PLAINS COUNTRY
“Say, Hank,” broke in Shorty O’Meara, “how much is in reason to swear when your stirrup leather busts on you, and your left eyebrow hits the ground?” “Aw, g’long with you,” Hank admonished, half sheepishly. “You know how much. If you don’t you’ll soon find out.” Old Snake Thompson’s sense of humor, liberty and justice was outraged. Snake used very little language of any sort; when he talked at all it was apt to be done almost exclusively in more or less conventional and automatic profanity, and he made husky protest: “But, Pearsall—Goddlemighty—I mean—how’s a man to talk? How’s a feller to express hisself? How’ll we get along without any o’ them words?” “Well,” said Hank dryly, “I could give you a pretty fair list of substitutes.” “Substitute cuss words?” “Yes, jest that. You may never have took notice to the fact that I don’t cuss, nor chew tobacker? Well, I used to do both—fact, I was something of a star performer in them two lines.” “What made you quit, Pearsall?” questioned Shorty discontentedly. “I quit,” said Hank, “when I got to be a family man, in a manner of speaking. I had a—there was a small chap at my place then, nigh about Pettie’s age, and I sort of looked it over, and made the change on the little feller’s account.” “Huh!” grunted Old Snake. Shorty made no com¬ ment, but Missouri said with feeling: “This da—durned cattle country is a mighty lone¬ some land, with few pleasures in it, if you ask me, and a man that neither chews nor cusses misses a sight o’ comfort.” “Oh, I dunno, Missou’,” the boss demurred mildly,
